Why do foreign men living here go back to their native country to get married?
I recently came across an interesting post that touches on the subject of why men go back to their native country to get married. In this specific post, it refers to the Bangladeshi men who were born in Bangladesh and living in the West such as UK, US and Canada.
Here is the original post…
Unfortunately, the post no longer accepts comments but it makes for interesting reading on this subject matter and people’s opinions and thoughts. Below is an article that was provided by Kameeth who is a member of Jumpdates.com.
Hmm, all very interesting comments to the post and all seem to share similar thoughts.
My take on having grown up in the UK and lived many years in the US but born young in Bangladesh is that I see many of the personalities of the kids being shaped by the parents.
I am no psychologist but I can speak from some experience.
The fact that many folks come to the US especially parents of young children have a strong inclination towards the Bengali culture. Unless the parents have a very ‘mixed’ and open view of the society here in US they will continue to profess and preach what they know without true appreciation of the western culture. It actually stems from the need to ‘blockade’ western influence which they have already argued as ‘too liberating or free’ which can potentially divert their children somehow towards a ‘bad path’ that can be damaging. What a shame, since I have seen both sides of the culture with an open mind and tried to acquire what is good on all sides without being judgmental and taking either side.
What happens as a result, is that the children take on a ‘mixed’ confused personality where their conversation centers around ‘oh, stop thinking like a white or gora’. Almost as though their ways of life are degenerate or something and the culture they follow is somehow superior to theirs. Firstly, it is very ignorant and bigoted thinking that is not going to win friends with any open minded person be it in the west or east. On the other token, they indirectly credit the white folks when it comes to discriminating black folks. Oh, this area must be good since it is primarily a white community!
Unfortunately, I have seen kids grown up in this thinking and the kids definitely are a bit messed up as a result. Their opinions are shaped by their parents and they stopped to think if they are even right or wrong. What makes it worse is that they choose to ‘live’ a life of two cultures, for example, I am too independent and want this ‘free lifestyle’ of the West but in some cases do not participate in the backward thinking of some Bengali ‘culture’. How quaint and convenient. It disheartens me when this is the kind of personalities I come across from the Bengali culture. The children end up taking advantage of their situation ie. let me enjoy the benefits of what Bengali has to offer ie. stay at home forever where mother and father can provide for me and let me simply delay the marriage. I am sorry, but you simply cannot do or think like that. The respect of one’s parents now come into the picture ie. to abide by them and follow the tradition of having an arranged marriage. I hope the readers understand that ‘independence’ comes at a price and not at the convenience of what the society has to offer.
I wanted to see how many readers would agree to some of these points.