A man goes hunting with a bunch of his friends on His land!! They have been hunting a while
and his best friend says\\”hey I can see in your bedroom with my scope\\”. He says “who’s that
man in the bedroom with your wife? The husband says \\”what? r u joking? The friend replies,”
no honestly. I can see them!! The husband says \\”Fine shoot her in the head and him in the
private!! The friend replies” I CAN GET THAT IN ONE SHOT!!!!!!!!\\”
——————————-
As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, \\”If
I\\’m going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman.\\”

She removes all her clothing and asks, \\”Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to
make me feel like a woman?\\”

A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, \\”Here, iron this!”
______________________________
How are women and tornadoes alike?

They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave
—————————–
A dog, a cat, and a penis are sitting around a camp fire one night. The dog says, \\”My life
sucks, my master makes me do my business on a fire hydrant!” The cat says, \\”I don\\’t think
so, my master makes me do my business in a box of cat litter.\\” The penis outraged, says \\”At
least your master doesn\\’t put a bag over your head and make you do push ups until you throw
up!\\”
_________________________

This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by
how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionalism goes right out the window…

He tells her to take her pants, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs.

\\”Do you know what I am doing?\\” asks the doctor?

\\”Yes, checking for abnormalities.\\” she replies.

He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing
her breasts and asks, \\”Do you know what I am doing now?” she replies, \\”Yes, checking for
cancer.\\”

Finally, he tells her to take off her panties, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and
starts having sex with her. He says to her, \\”Do you know what I am doing now?\\”

She replies, \\”Yes, getting harpies’ – that’s why I am here!\\”
—————————————-

She left him on the sofa when the phone rang, and was back in a few seconds.

\\”Who was it?\\” he asked.

\\”My husband,\\” she replied.

\\”I better get going,\\” he said. \\”Where was he?\\”

\\”Relax. He\\’s downtown playing poker with you.\\”

______________________________

Wife: \\”I dreamt they were auctioning off****. The big ones went for ten dollars and the
thick ones went for twenty dollars.\\”

Husband: \\”How about the ones like mine?\\”

Wife: \\”Those they gave away.\\”

Husband: \\”I had a dream too…I dreamt they were auctioning off****. The pretty ones went
for a thousand dollars, and the little tight ones went for two thousand.\\”

Wife: \\”And how much for the ones like mine?\\”

Husband: \\”That\\’s where they held the auction.\\”

Hazemjax