We often hear from other people that ‘listening’ is a great skill to have but everyone has a different approach to this. In fact, many people especially singles going out on their first date can quite easily botch up the date if this skill is not understood properly or practiced.

So you have met your partner though the free dating site and you are now both sitting across the table having coffee or lunch. This is the best time to hone in on your skills in the listening department because how you come across to each other will determine the outcome of the entire date. Apart from the physical attraction that may exist between the two of you, you are also trying to get snippets of each other through conversation.

If you find yourself the extroverted and the incessant talker, which you should very well know by now, then you definitely have to slow down during the date. This can be hard for some people but a good practice would be to take short breaks when you talk and then distract your mind with something. A good tip is to throw a question back to the other person and wait for them to respond. Remember, this shows an interest on your part and also courteousness and consideration that are slowly diminishing from our society today. When you find yourself in the receiving end of an avid talker, you can do many things such as a mild interruption or changing the topic.

You may find yourself with someone who doesn’t say much and this could be due to many things such as shyness or insecurity etc. Your best bet is to keep the conversation moving and this would be a good time when you can talk about something that you like, for example your hobby. However, only do this when you find yourself needing to ‘pad’ the conversation.

For some people talking becomes natural to them but can be harder for others. Be sure to check out the profile of the person you are dating in more detail so you can feel that you are somewhat matched and the date will not completely go south. Having lots of pictures especially of you engaged in activities on the free dating site will surely tell you more about the person, their personality and the likelihood of the dating conversation.

For more interesting reading, please follow the related articles below…

First time meeting after the online encounter – where to go

Shyness can get in the way of dating

Who should pay on the first date?